Sunday, November 13, 2016
Sunday, October 23, 2016
Life's Betrayals
Life's betrayals come in many forms
It comes in the treachery of those
Whom you thought were life friends
And held close to your heart ---
Until that cruel stab in the back
--- Oh, the excruciating pain of that knife
So sharp!
It comes in the disappointments
That Life's hand deals out to you
What began so full of promise
Turns out to be an illusory mirage ---
And then comes that mid-life reckoning
--- Oh, the excruciating twist of that knife
So sharp!
But the biggest betrayal of them all
Is when Life itself forsakes you
That which you took for granted
Your life's breaths, your heart's beats ---
Your companions since you were born, suddenly gone
--- Oh, the excruciating thrust of that knife
So sharp!
It comes in the treachery of those
Whom you thought were life friends
And held close to your heart ---
Until that cruel stab in the back
--- Oh, the excruciating pain of that knife
So sharp!
It comes in the disappointments
That Life's hand deals out to you
What began so full of promise
Turns out to be an illusory mirage ---
And then comes that mid-life reckoning
--- Oh, the excruciating twist of that knife
So sharp!
But the biggest betrayal of them all
Is when Life itself forsakes you
That which you took for granted
Your life's breaths, your heart's beats ---
Your companions since you were born, suddenly gone
--- Oh, the excruciating thrust of that knife
So sharp!
Sunday, May 1, 2016
At least he had an old age home, In bestest cult no tears are shed forVrindavan Widows
(I've finally written a poem after a long time. It is inspired by this:
'This man died alone in an old age home. What he left behind brought tears to everyone's eyes' http://www.speakingtree.in/blog/this-86yearold-man-died-alone-in-an-old-age-home-what-he-left-behind-brought-tears-to-everyones-eyes )
At least he had an old age home, in bestest cult no tears are shed for Vrindavan Widows
At least he had an old age home where he could write of his loneliness - the loneliness of those who are no longer of use, Vrindavan Widows of bestest cult don't have the privilege of writing their heart rending poems, telling of their plight -
Most of them are illiterate anyway, their redundancy began when they were born, born the accursed gender, a female child, in the bestest cult -
Most of them will be ignored anyway, their redundancy makes the stories of their plight irrelevant, in the bestest cult -
At least he had an old age home where he was placed, perhaps by a family too busy to take care, perhaps too uncaring to take care, perhaps he went there himself seeking the care his increasing infirmity needed, Vrindavan Widows are thrown out on the streets by the "sacred families" of bestest cult, thrown out because they bring bad luck, their very shadow, evil, because of the evil of losing their husbands, to death.
If stay she must, in the "sacred family" where she had given birth to the much longed for, the most prized for, the most prayed for, sons, she must live like a shadow in the dark corners of her home, no longer her home, which, when a new bride, a new mother, with loving care, a tender hand, she had tended, fed, decorated, kept spic and span.
But now, a widow, like an empty shadow she must exist. A shaven head, a plain white sari, bare hands, bare ears, a bare neck - these would be her adornments from henceforth, for the rest of her life. No outward signs of being, of feeling, of thinking, of life, must she show. For her, from henceforth, her plate would be sparse, devoid of flavour. For her, from henceforth, her face would be blank, devoid of laughter. Like an empty shadow - alive, but dead - she must exist in the dark corners of her existence, in the home that once was her home, if stay she must.
But when a burden she becomes, an extra mouth to feed, a superfluous relic of a forgotten past, cantankerous and needy, needy of the same tender love, the same tender care, she once freely gave, then go she must. If reluctant she is, if resist she does, out she will be thrown, bundled, shoved into a train, to Vrindavan. A Vrindavan Widow she will be from henceforth, miles away from a home that once was her home, for the rest of her life. The dusty streets of Vrindavan would be her new home, for the rest of her life.
At least he had an old age home where his basic needs were cared for, Vrindavan Widows eke out a living begging on the streets of the land of the bestest cult
At least he had an old age home where he lived his full life in relative dignity, in bestest cult, young Vrindavan Widows are no longer burnt alive as Sati on their dead husband's pyre, but are debased, prostituted, supplied to any customer who will use and pay for their keep by the very ashrams they seek shelter in
At least he had an old age home with hygienic facilities, medicines for his ailing old body, Vrindavan Widows must live in grime and dirt, victims of sexually transmitted diseases, TB, dysentery
At least he had an old age home where his infirmities were assisted, a warm bed with a mattress, clean bed sheets and a blanket, Vrindavan Widows, worn out and feeble, must fend for themselves - bathe, cook and feed themselves, no helping hands to help climb up steep rickety steps to grimy hovels where the hard floor is their resting place - no hot water baths, no warm blankets, not even a bed to stave off the winter chill creeping through their wrinkled skin, wasted limbs, deep into their brittle bones
At least he had an old age home with running water, toilets and sewage system, Vrindavan Widows must live squalid lives at the end of their lives in the land of the bestest cult
At least he had an old age home where family visited him sometimes, Vrindavan Widows live and die, hidden away, forgotten, shunned by their families, ignored by a society that prides itself as the bestest cult
Tuesday, August 18, 2015
a mother's wait
the eyes are full - black
no light reflections
the plump full face
suddenly thin - haggard
the whispering crowd waits
with the mother
some are softly weeping
wiping unbidden tears
the mother(planted on the sofa)
her eyes still uncomprehending
breaks into sudden wails
(the weeping crowd wails with her
..some offer her low words of solace)
but she soon subsides
into her haggard silence
her eyes look towards
the open door sometimes
(the doorstep littered with
sandals, shoes, and more people)
and sometimes at the
chadar spread at her feet
then back to the door
almost as a mother would
when expecting her child back from school
it was around midnight when we got the news
now it's about 12 noon
what is causing the delay
why isn't he back home yet
her black eyes, full, unreflecting
questions the open doorway
suddenly there is a buzz
he is arriving in 10 minutes
a roll of fresh wails erupts
a little later
someone says, he's come
the mother now tearless, silent
looks expectantly at the doorway
almost as if her 9 year old
would run in with his schoolbag
shouting, "Mother, I am hungry..give me something to eat!"
it begins to rain
the mother looks out of the window
her tears flowing down now
and says, "Look, it's raining"
they carry her 9 year old son in
limp and small, wrapped in white
and lay him on the chadar at her feet
(my neighbour's 9 year old son died on the 14th. i used to chat with him whenever i spotted him. he was a reserved child, but was naughty with his mother, as she would often tell me. he was operated on for a cyst in the brain and died. we are an old neighbourhood. it was a terrible shock for all of us.)
no light reflections
the plump full face
suddenly thin - haggard
the whispering crowd waits
with the mother
some are softly weeping
wiping unbidden tears
the mother(planted on the sofa)
her eyes still uncomprehending
breaks into sudden wails
(the weeping crowd wails with her
..some offer her low words of solace)
but she soon subsides
into her haggard silence
her eyes look towards
the open door sometimes
(the doorstep littered with
sandals, shoes, and more people)
and sometimes at the
chadar spread at her feet
then back to the door
almost as a mother would
when expecting her child back from school
it was around midnight when we got the news
now it's about 12 noon
what is causing the delay
why isn't he back home yet
her black eyes, full, unreflecting
questions the open doorway
suddenly there is a buzz
he is arriving in 10 minutes
a roll of fresh wails erupts
a little later
someone says, he's come
the mother now tearless, silent
looks expectantly at the doorway
almost as if her 9 year old
would run in with his schoolbag
shouting, "Mother, I am hungry..give me something to eat!"
it begins to rain
the mother looks out of the window
her tears flowing down now
and says, "Look, it's raining"
they carry her 9 year old son in
limp and small, wrapped in white
and lay him on the chadar at her feet
(my neighbour's 9 year old son died on the 14th. i used to chat with him whenever i spotted him. he was a reserved child, but was naughty with his mother, as she would often tell me. he was operated on for a cyst in the brain and died. we are an old neighbourhood. it was a terrible shock for all of us.)
Monday, December 1, 2014
The River
I flow, Into the ocean, I become one with it
I vaporize, I become cloud, Crash into the face
Of jagged mountain, Sentinel of the world
I flow once again, Once again, I become river
Meandering through forest lands and plains
Ever inconstant, Ever
constant
Ever evaporating, Ever replenishing
Ever changing, Ever the same
Ever dying, Ever eternal
Ever flowing, Ever being still
On my face, I mirror, Your face, And those of whom you love
Those who have departed, Those who sojourn, Those who are
yet to arrive
Beneath my surface, Beyond the sound, Of my mighty roar
If you put your ear to my heart, And listen with care, You
will hear
The sacred sound – AUM –
The first flowing out, The second flowing in
The third flowing into silence – AUM -
And then there is, A hidden fourth, Beyond that silence
Another silence, An all encircling silence
The womb, Within which, Is held
The roar, Of The Cosmic Ocean
Thursday, November 6, 2014
Weekend Wine & Jazz, And a pictorial tale of the eternal traingle
Have come down to Pune for the weekend, the birds are chirping, squaking, the
cats are lounging about or the males vying for the attention of the current
female around. The fights in these encounters can get pretty loud and bloody.
Big Frey, being the oldest is getting a rough time these days. The younger,
stronger tawny tom has practically chewed up Big Grey's ears. I love this moment
I've managed to capture in this pic - the eternal traingle theme of Bollywood
blockbusters - where the two males are yowling and glaring at each other
threateningly, while the female seemingly is feigning a 'bored with you kiddish
guys' look (actually, if you can read cats' eyes/faces, she is scared) - Cats
can be so human sometimes.
My weekends are pretty fun and busy these days - trekking, musical shows, art
shows and so on. This weekend I'm gonna join a bunch of wine experts and lovers
for wine tasting - spanish wine it is - at a fine dine. And a day of jazz music.
Both of which I'm looking forward to. Meanwhile, a friend of mine has gifted me
a bottle of Bordeaux which I'm saving for some special occasion, though it's
really hard to resist.
Meanwhile, finished the third
One of the problems I have with my painting - the motivation part of it - is
that I soon get bored with a piece I may be painting once I solve the puzzle or
challenge. After it stops being a challenge, after the puzzle is resolved in my
mind, it just becomes a 'going through the motions' kind of exercise. If I do
manage to actually finish a piece, like this one, it's due to sheer perseverance
- and I hate 'perseverance' when I'm painting, it has to be exciting all
through.
Anyway, despite my hating it, on to perseverance with my purple flowers and my
sunflowers.
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